THE STUDY
LAUNCH:
1) Have a mini debate (Break your group in half. Give them a minute or two to discuss among themselves then have each side present their case.)
- SIDE ONE: It’s okay to lie.
- SIDE TWO: It’s not okay to lie.
— Or —
2) Ask “Has someone you trusted ever lied to you or gossiped about you? How did it make you feel?” “Who benefits from lying and gossiping?”
EXPLORE
1. Read Ephesians 4:17-32. Where do you see the passage talking about the way we talk, and what does it say?
2. According to this passage, what are some reasons we would want to live differently than the culture around us in the way we talk?
3. What does Proverbs 6:12-19 say about God’s attitude toward lying and gossip? Why do you think he feels this way?
APPLY
4. How would you feel if someone you trusted lied or gossiped about you?
– Have you ever had that happen?
– How did it affect your relationship with that person and others?
(you don’t need to name names or give specifics)
5. In what kinds of situations are you most tempted to lie or gossip?
– What about those situations makes you want to say something that you shouldn’t?
– Do you find it easy or difficult to resist this temptation?
6. The passage in Ephesians 4 talks about putting off your sinful nature (former way of life) and putting on your new nature. What are some tools or people that God has given you to help you do this?
7. What should you do if you realize you have lied or gossiped?
8. Lying and gossip are so common in our culture that sometimes we are unaware we are doing it. The Bible tells us that the Holy Spirit is called the Spirit of truth and will guide us into all truth. (John 14:17) He also convicts us of sin. (John 16:8). Pray and ask the Holy Spirit to reveal to you this week any time that your words are not pleasing to God.
THE STUDY
LAUNCH:
Imagine that you’re at a college football game. The stadium is a sea of blue (the color of the home team). However, you’re wearing red because you’re cheering with the few who are cheering for the visiting team. How do you think you might feel, act, and cheer for your team differently because of being in the minority?
EXPLORE:
1. Read 1 Corinthians 6:15-17. How should we see ourselves if we’re followers of Christ?
2. What question does Paul (the writer of 1 Corinthians) ask in verse 15?
– What’s the problem with taking a member of Christ’s body and joining it sexually to a prostitute or anyone you’re not married to (verses 16-17)?
3. Verse 17 says followers of Christ have joined themselves to the Lord. This means our greatest satisfaction comes from our connection to Jesus, not from sexual connection. How does this affect our thinking and choices about sex?
4. Read 1 Corinthians 6:18-20. How should we handle it when we have the chance to be sexually immoral?
–What are some good ways to respond when faced with specific temptations like pornography or being sexually active with a boyfriend or girlfriend?
When specific temptations arise (like viewing porn or being sexually active with a boyfriend or girlfriend), remember to RUN!
R – Realize that Jesus is better. Being connected to Jesus is way more satisfying than any pleasure that could come from these things. Sinning will break your fellowship with God and make it harder to connect with Him.
U – Understand that God has given you the power to resist the temptation. The power of God’s Spirit and the support of others can help us make right choices sexually. Only God’s Spirit can give the power we need to live in a way that honors him. And it’s good to involve friends who share your faith in Christ as you seek to flee these temptations. Text or call to let them know what’s going on and ask for prayer and encouragement.
N – Nip temptation before it turns into sin. Examples include turning off your phone when you’re tempted to use it to view porn, or choosing not to be alone if you’re facing temptation with your boyfriend or girlfriend.
5. Verse 18 says that one reason to live differently in our sexuality is that sexual immorality is sin against our own bodies. How does knowing that sexual immorality hurts you rather than helps you motivate you to live differently?
6. Verse 19 says another reason to live differently in our sexuality is that we belong to God. Explain what you think this means in your own words.
7. Verse 20 says another reason to live differently in our sexuality is that we want to honor (i.e., show off) God in our bodies with the sexual choices we make. What difference does it make in our sexual choices that we’ve been bought with a price, the price of Jesus giving his life for us?
APPLY:
8. In contrast to what God says, how does our culture encourage us to see sexuality?
9. What difference does it make for our identity to be in our relationship with God instead of in our sexuality (i.e., whether we’re married, single, gay, straight, or dating someone)?
10. What are the hardest things about living for God in your sexuality?
11. What from this study motivates you to live differently in your choices about sex and find your identity in God?
– How could the Holy Spirit help you live differently in this area?
THE STUDY
LAUNCH:
1) Have you ever taken one of those online quizzes? Like “20 questions that will tell you how long you’d survive on a desert island” or “Which Disney Princess Are You?” Why do you think these quizzes are so popular? If you do these quizzes, do you ever post/share the results with friends? Why or why not? In what ways does social media contribute to comparison?
- Or –
2) Arm wrestling competition – Have your guys arm wrestle each other. See who is the strongest. Make it fun and get everyone involved. Say, “Whether we’re arm wrestling, competing for grades, or trying to look good on social media, we are always tempted to compare ourselves to others. Why is that?”
EXPLORE
Let’s look at a couple of passages in the Bible where people compared themselves
1. Read Luke 18:9-14. What is happening in this story? What does the person doing the comparing think about himself?
2. What are the results of comparison in this person’s life?
3. Read 1 Samuel 18:5-9.
– What is going on in this passage?
– Who is doing the comparing?
4. Read more of the story in 1 Samuel 18:20-29.
– According to verses 5-9 and verses 20-29 what are some of the results of comparison in King Saul’s life?
– What other thoughts or observations do you make?
5. The last passage mentions that Saul became jealous of David. According to Proverbs 14:30, how does jealousy affect a person?
6. What are the similarities between the people in the Luke passage and the 1 Samuel passage?
– How are those similar to the way we compare ourselves to others today?
APPLY
7. In what areas are you most likely to compare yourself to others? (ex. body/looks, athletic ability, money and possessions, intelligence, street smarts, etc.)
8. When you compare yourself to others, are you more likely to be tempted toward pride and self-righteousness (the result of thinking yourself better than others) or envy and jealousy (the result of thinking you lack what others have)?
9. The following quotes are from the Dove Self esteem Project. Read them together as a group and talk about the ways that you can relate to them…
“You think, ‘I’ll just have a quick look!’ – and you’re there for ages. You look at everyone else’s posts and you think: ‘They’re so pretty. Their life is so cool.’ It can make you think everyone is having a better time than you. It can make you feel not good about yourself, because you think: ‘What’s wrong with me? Why aren’t I having that sort of time?’ And what you have to remember is: people post their best moments. No life is high point after high point. Who posts their fat pictures, or their bad hair days? Yep, that’s right – no one.”
“I kept seeing all these cool parties on social media websites, and I was thinking: ‘Wow, they’re just so much fun. Why are all the parties I go to so dull?’ And then I realized: I am AT those parties. They’re dull because they’re full of people just looking at their phones and taking pictures.”
10. How can knowing the truth about who you are and what God says about you in his Word help guard you from the traps of comparison?
– What are some examples of these truths you can remember when you are tempted to compare yourself?
11. What is one truth from this study you want to remember?
To explore further:
Some other passages in the Bible where comparison plays a role:
THE STUDY
LAUNCH:
What would be harder for you:
1.) Having someone text you and you not responding right away?
2.) Having someone put your favorite dessert in front of you but you not eating it right away?
Explain your answer.
EXPLORE:
Read Matthew 4: 1-1
1. Explain in your own words what happened as this story began.
2. In verses 3-4, how did the devil tempt Jesus toward instant gratification and how did Jesus respond?
3. In verses 5-7, what did the devil do to tempt Jesus toward instant gratification and how did he handle this temptation?
4. In verses 8-11, how did the devil try to move Jesus toward instant gratification and what did Jesus do in response
5. What was the same in each of Jesus’ responses to the temptation of instant gratification (see Matthew 4:4, 6, 10)?
APPLY:
6. Where is the temptation of instant gratification strongest in your life? What are some of the consequences of giving in?
7. How does having Jesus as an example and savior help when the temptation of instant gratification strikes?
8. What can you learn from Jesus’ example of fighting the temptation of instant gratification with God’s word every time?
9. Based on what we’ve discussed today, what’s something you can apply with the help of the Holy Spirit the next time this temptation strikes?
10. Jesus was able to resist the temptation of instant gratification because he treasured his relationship with God the Father more than anything. What would it look like for you to treasure your relationship with God more than anything in the face of the temptations you face?
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